whiny bitch

well there is only one thing i can't stand, piranha, he said.
what's that??
that you always compare Europe with America, you rub it in the face of the people, that makes you really appear arrogant, you know? I've never heard you saying how gorgeous Berlin is, period. You always have to compare it. It get's on my nerves. You know thats one thing about Europeans, they are all so fucking arrogant. They come here and talk the whole time about how much better it is over there. What the fuck? I mean, thats like telling a person without arms how gorgeous it would be for him if he could only play basketball. You get the point? I hate it here, too! I fucking hate it! I don't want to be here, but a lot of people, including me right now, can't get away. So, what's your point? making them feel bad? please....

I look at him. Man, yes, I don't really want to be a whiny arrogant bitch who makes others feel inferior, disadvantaged, bad...- if you know what I mean. Who would want to??? The question is maybe rather, who would care to... But I admit, I talk a lot about these things, but then again, I can't talk about pop culture really without embarrassing myself because of my lacking knowledge of names, dates and according bits of entertainment, art or whatever. And pop culture is like, the main thing I hear people talk about, at least at my school, naturally....... - Talking about spiritual things, about basic opinions, won't have me compare Europe and America too much darling. It's just, these everyday things, i can't help it. For example, this so called chocolate croissant here, in front of me. GARBAGE! In any shitty store in Berlin I would find better stuff. Denny's, your beloved Denny's for example. I understand that you love it because you love shrimpp and it's cheap and you have tons of memories connected to Denny's, like being high as a kite and fulfilling the craving for food and what not, but, seriously, I. DO. NOT. LIKE. IT.
Then you say no matter what, you can't make me happy anyways, it's never enough.
Ah.
That sucks, honestly. I hate the plastic plate they gave me with the croissant. I hate this ignorance. All that. Aah. Maybe I am just homesick like fuck and this is the result. I hate the clinic sterile atmosphere in this freaking cafe. No coziness. Oh god, I am really not really happy here. I could never live here. Yesterday night when we went out with your italian friend/teacher, you got so mad because we were revelling in the beauty of Europe and Italy and all that.

Maybe you are afraid to lose me to Europe. But you could come along. Maybe you would understand me, if you went there and came back.

The point is, if an American would come to Europe and complain about shit everybody would nodd understandingly: he is homesick. But NOBODY would get fucking offended or think he is arrogant. They would think he is ignorant hahaha. In their arrogance they would think 'poor American, we were right, they are complete idiots!' Maybe I am too attached to my cultural background, maybe I am too unflexible to embrace another culture. But matter of factly, I embraced enthusiastically the Russian culture, I will freak out in South America and Africa, I know that already. But there is nothing here, that can freak me out in a good way.

Except for you honey.